A time for eeflection.

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 Took myself off to this secret spot me and wee betty used to go too years ago when I was trying my best to give up drink and drugs. I used to come here and do some yoga and meditation barefoot, connecting to nature and my inner self.


I used to always tell myself all them years ago that after I do this I cant go on the drink and drugs, I'm going to go home and read a book or something.

But it was always on goods days I headed here and on the way back I would have passed a few pubs with people drinking outside.

Nearly every time I went here with the intention not to drink after, as I passed these pubs on the way back the little tempting demon in me always got the better of me and I was in the pub getting drunk in no time.


Last night as I drove past one of the pubs on the way down it was packed outside with everyone getting tipsy and there wasn't one feeling inside me like I was missing something or craved a pint.


It was 10 years ago that I really started to make the effort to break away from my old toxic life. And it was exactly 10 years ago this year I got caught up in the last of some serious underworld stuff.

I got robbed for every penny I had in a major operation we had going.. The guy that robbed me who was a so called good friend at the time did me the biggest favour ever. At the time it didnt feel like it but it really was a blessing in disguise.

Not only did he rob me for over 100k but the aftermath was worse. I had big worries on my head about what was coming after. Cant really go into too much detail but it was a massive head melt for me.

Then on top of all that my business that I had going got closed down due to health and safety breach and then I got prosecuted for deception. I really couldn't have been left in any worse state.


The same guy that robbed me of the 100k was the same person I believe who informed the authorities of my manufacturing business I had going were I cut a lot of corners to get by. Again I cant say too much on this. Wouldn't really be inline with my Buddhist right speech practice. Try to refrain from speech that causes divide or upset is one of the Buddhas eightfold path. If I said what business I was up too there would seriously be a lot of annoyed people out there. I dont know what type of person I was back then to be honest.

That underworld can really pollute the soul.


Anyhow this guy that robbed me and then grassed me up did me the biggest favour. If I had of still had that 100k he took and my dodgy half legit business I would have just carried on in my old ways of drinking and taking drugs.

I was left with nothing!!


Right around this time I met this girl who was my spirit guide, she took a keen interest in me and she was the one who introduced me into the spiritual life. She opened the door to yoga and meditation for me and many other things. I would not have found the Buddhist monastery without her either.


When the authorities came to raid my business I knew I was finished. They said that I was to be detained until the place gets investigated and that everything is they're property now. I went to get in my van to drive away and they tried to restrain me saying I cant go anywhere. I got aggressive with them got in my van anyway.

They started to get very annoyed with me saying im not allowed to drive in that van. I just said to to them out the window - right now guys, I dont give a f**k. There are 2 things I'm going to do here and thats either kill myself or go and become a monk!


I never forget the look on their faces. And I dont know why I said the monk thing.

But as I drove away I knew I needed away from my old life and all the people of the underworld. I just had one problem, my delboy dad who I loved so much was one of the biggest players in the underworld. I couldn't escape him and all his cronies.


For the next few years I spent breaking away from all my old ways, wee betty came into my life and it was just us and nature. battling my demons daily. I cant go back to that old life I was brought up in. I made deal with myself to live morally and truthfully. This put my delboys dads head away as much of the stuff he sold was gotten in immoral ways. I wanted nothing to do with it. Not even touch it.

I seen what this energy did to me. Its poisonous and it will pollute you.


It took many years to get where I am now, its been some journey but worth it.


Writing time over this morming guys. Got stuff to do here. 


Hope you enjoyed. 


Peace and love 


The Phantom Planter





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