Some more of the book I'm writing!

 Here's some more from the book I'm writing, if you enjoy please plant a tree. 

Chapter 61 - My wee mum passes away.

This is a very hard chapter for me to write as I feel some way responsible for my wee mum passing away, you see I went and seen her every day in life, as I've said I was a mummys boy and proud of it.

Every morning without fail I went and made her breakfast in bed, made sure her laptop was all working ok and told her of all my antics and we would be in fits of laughter. She was bed ridden for years and and all she did was play online poker and bingo.

I was the only one that really knew my wee rebel mum, I knew how to handle her fiery anger and temper she had, I know I was the light in her life.

When I went away I knew this was killing her, she was deteriorating very fast, when I used to come back and visit I was noticing more and more she was going downhill, my wee mum was only young, in her early 60s but she was very ill for many years.

In Buddhism they say emotions like anger will poison the body and make you sick, I believe this, my wee mum carried much anger in her life which I do believe manifested into her illnesses.

Me and my 2 bothers have severe anger issues also, me though thankfully with the teachings of the Buddha I've managed to get on top of mine.

Buddhism has taught me that when I see someone in states of anger to have compassion for them, they are not liking being in these states of negative emotions, when I look back in my life when I was in fits of rage and anger it was not a nice place to be.

Anyhow from I came back from Lanzarote my wee mum was never the same and one day she got taken into hospital with a chest infection and I never really thought anything of it, then I get a call from my dad saying she has passed away, I couldn't believe it, I remember I was standing in serendipity with a customer when I took the call and when I came off the phone I just said to the customer "My wee MA is dead!!"

I will never forget what happened after that, it was Friday 13th of all days for my wee mum to pass and I walked outside my warehouse, looked up at the sky and there was a huge flock of house martins just arriving from Africa!!

I couldn't believe it, I was waiting on these little special birds that I'd built a connection with, for some reason it put my mind at ease seeing them just arrive from the other end of the world, nature back then was communicating with me.

Love these little birds and still today I go back up with my binoculars and watch them.

Changing times from watching contraband factories for the police or gangsters to watching house martins.

It was through the passing of my wee mum that I really first ever connected to Buddhism, as I've said my wee mum turned her back on the Catholic church and always spoke highly of Buddhism saying "if your ever going to pick a faith son, pick Buddhism for they love everyone, even the animals they love".

So when she passed my brothers were talking about getting a minister for the funeral service and I was like she wasn't religious, I'm not sure she'd want that, so I started researching Buddhist centres in Belfast and this one came up.

I called up the number and I was speaking with a Buddhist nun and I said to her do you do funeral services at all?

She said she has never did one before but that she would do it no problem. I give her the details and was so over the moon about this.

I know my brothers and others in our estate thought I was mad but I didnt care!

In this Buddhist nun comes to our wee street dressed in the orange robes and everyone looking at her, she came in with a gettoblaster and stuck on some really nice chanting and done a whole Buddhist ritual over my wee mums body.

To be honest I was absolutely pissed out of my mind during this whole process, I remember I was drinking this homemade polish vodka at the time which was like rocket fuel and was in a complete mess but I remember this Buddhist nun who I was one day to become friends with.

After she done the ritual over my wee mums body my delboy dad starts waving his hands up in the air like someone thats just been saved at one of them gospel meetings shouting at the nun "fer f**ksake love that was beautiful, I thought she was going to rise up out of the box"!!

So funny this moment was, my delboy dad sure could come off with them!

Writing this chapter for me has been one of tears and laughs.

******More of this chapter in the book.